Holidays Filled With Holes and Hope

It's the most wonderful time of the year.

The time between Thanksgiving and Christmas will remain my favorite season. It's the lights that brighten the dead of late fall and early winter.

To me, there is nothing more magical than watching the reflection of Christmas lights in the eyes of children. From the time they are babies, you could look at their eyes and see the magic that the twinkling of lights create.

Last winter, my youngest daughter wanted to walk through a park filled with lights. As we strolled through the path adorned with festive Christmas lights, I noticed all the families taking in the sights. To see and hear the excitement in the little voices that ran from display to display was priceless. I took the time to really soak in that spirit of Christmas.

In this month filled with Thanksgiving, I think about those cherished memories from my childhood.

I remember those holidays spent in both my grandparents tiny homes and how it filled every possible space with family and friends. The laughter and their memories being shared were things I took for granted at the time. Now as I look back, they are cherished memories of a family that I am blessed to be a part of.

The hole left by the passing of my grandparents and my dad have made me truly appreciate the family that I have remaining.

I have a mom battling cancer, aunts and uncles facing health issues and many relatives scattered between states. Some people struggle with the loss of jobs, loved ones, homes, relationships and some simply lose faith. There are holes that are left.

There was a time when I struggled to have faith after the loss of two pregnancies. Now I can be very thankful that I was blessed with two beautiful daughters.

Without the holes, we fail to see the hope. The hope that comes from the new.

New babies, new friends, new jobs, new homes, new beginnings.

You see, with a hole there is a hollow space. This space will need to be filled.

That is why we must cling to hope. We hope that things will turn out for the best. We believe and we trust that the holes will be filled.

A few days ago I heard a song that was once a favorite of my oldest daughter. She danced and twirled around every time it would play on the radio. Often, she would ask me to dance with her and as I held her and we twirled around, she seemed so peaceful with the words and melody of the song. During this time, I gazed at this beautiful child that calls me "Mom" and the hope I thought was lost was now restored.

I Hope You Dance

By Lee Ann Womack

 

I hope you never lose your sense of wonder
You get your fill to eat but always keep that hunger
May you never take one single breath for granted
God forbid love ever leave you empty handed
I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean
Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens
Promise me that you'll give faith a fighting chance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance

I hope you dance
I hope you dance

 

I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance
Never settle for the path of least resistance
Livin' might mean takin' chances, but they're worth takin'
Lovin' might be a mistake, but it's worth makin'
Don't let some Hellbent heart leave you bitter
When you come close to sellin' out, reconsider
Give the heavens above more than just a passing glance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance

I hope you dance

I hope you dance

 

My friends, may your holidays holes be filled with hope, peace, grace, kindness and love.

The Un-Comfort Zone

Isaiah 30:21
If you stray to the right or to the left, you will hear a word that comes from behind you: "This is the way, walk in it."

Recently at a church meeting, we were given the task of discussing certain visions and needs in our church.

Working in a small group, I made a startling discovery about myself and my own comfort zone.

Normal is comfortable to me. I like to blend into the scenery rather than being seen. Being ordinary, living an ordinary life is what is comfortable to me.

I like to sit in the same spot at church. I have the same routine every Sunday. We arrive a little early, I help get the coffee nook running. I speak the few people who stop by to make their cup of coffee or to others as I take my spot toward the back of the sanctuary.

There are people I see almost every Sunday morning. People I am familiar with and who make me comfortable in our beautiful building that is filled with history.

Then it's time to step out of my comfort zone. When the Pastor says "Let's take a few minutes and greet your neighbor".

I stand up and cannot move. It's not that I'm paralyzed with fear but I do not feel comfortable stepping out to intentionally greet others.

Why is it so hard for me to step out of my comfort zone?

I occasionally help with our Saturday night community service that is held in the building adjacent to our sanctuary.

There are people from other churches that attend and I find myself speaking to them as we serve their meal. We form a line for communion and we rest our hands on the person in front and pray for them.

So why is it so hard for me to leave my pew?

I will admit that I do struggle with meeting new people. There is rise that creeps up my spine and makes me very nervous. Most people would never suspect it because I give a smile but inside I am a bowl of jello.

The fear of rejection and my lack of trust is what I believe keep me in my comfort zone. I may not get the response I expect or I may say the wrong thing and become tongue tied. That fear keeps me in my zone of what is comfortable for me.

How do I overcome these things?

I have to rely on the advice a classmate gave me a few months ago.

My friend Dot and I were talking about how I felt I always let the wrong people into my life and I asked her why I make such bad choices. She looked at me and said "Kim, you're going to have to learn to close your heart to some people. God will let you know which ones to let in."

Why didn't I ever think of that? It was because I needed that friend to tell me what I needed to hear.

She wasn't saying I needed to put up a wall but I needed to be still and let the Holy Spirit be my guide.

So, I am working on greeting people, making new friends and really listening to those whispers and guidance that only God will provide.

With practice, I will eventually learn to be comfortable in the un-comfort zone.

My soul feels a greater peace now knowing that I am a becoming the woman God created me to be.

What drives you out of your comfort zone? Can you you overcome those feelings to take a step out of your comfort zone?