What?? This wasn't in my owners manual! I felt like I had failed Motherhood 101. Oh well, better late than never. I began praying for him that night.
I really began to think about what I would pray for and he would need to know. Essentially this post is the product of many months worth of thoughts that I assembled into a letter.
Dear Future Son-in-Law's,
I know this is early and they are still young, but I want you to know that I'm praying for you now. Not just for the sake of my daughters and their happiness, but also because I know you will quickly be the son I never had. You will be the father of my grandchildren and very much a part of our family. You will be accepted, not judged and loved unconditionally. You are the upcoming chapters in my book of life.
Do you know how much I love and adore my beautiful daughters? There is nothing in this world I wouldn't do to see them walking through each of their days with their hearts filled with love and joy. Just to see them smile...it will melt your heart!
I know at first you will more interested in how pretty they are on the outside, but they are breathtakingly beautiful on the inside as well. As you get to know them, you will learn the things they are passionate about.
They love animals. They love to be accepted for who they are and love to be hugged and cuddle. They each have a close relationship with me and there is an unstoppable bond we share. They also love the Lord.
I warn you though, Hadley, she's quite spirited. Her zest for life leaves those around her often feeling exhausted. She will test your limits but you will need to step back and give her room to fly when she needs it. She's competitive too. She can be hard on herself and throw a pity party. I'm sorry, she inherited that. She's stubborn too. Like, "my feet are cemented down and I am not budging" stubborn. That part is not inherited from me. When she loves you, she will go to battle for you and with you. She will detest anyone who has ever wronged you. She will speak her mind, even when she should keep quiet. She prefers smaller crowds so expect to cuddle up and watch a movie rather than going to big parties. She's an introvert deep down.
Emery has a very tender heart and you will need to guard it and protect it because it will get wounded easily. She likes to do things perfectly and takes things very seriously. Don't joke around with her too much or she will cry. She will be fiercely loyal to you and be the most honest person you have ever met. Her honesty will come with compassion and will not be harsh or rude. She is a caregiver. She will keep your secrets and can think things through rationally. She is wise for her years. She would never hurt anyone intentionally. She doesn't like arguing or drama. When she's quiet, you can find her with a book and she will get lost in the pages. I hope you have a creative side because she has a great imagination.
At this point, it's too soon to tell exactly what kind of homemaker they will be. If you love chicken strips and quesadillas, you are in luck! Those are their favorites along with cheese pizza. Hadley prefers fettuccine alfredo and Emery prefers spaghetti with meatballs.
Neither one will keep a tidy room. If you are okay with tripping over shoes, clean/dirty clothes or finding jewelry or hair bands left in various places around the house, they will be forever grateful for your grace rather than your criticism.
I do recommend saving now for a gym membership. They both have an insatiable sweet tooth and I doubt it will ever be controlled. Yes, they inherited this from me also. The good news is, you will have dessert every day! They will bounce off the walls with energy early in the day but will move to a snails pace by the end. Make sure you can keep up or they will quickly grow bored and may even melt into a puddle of tears or simply fall asleep.
If you are the man who has chosen Hadley, I will tell you for sure, when she falls in love with you, she is yours. She's honest to the core and will not lie to you or betray you. She will be a devoted wife and an amazing mother. I vision her being the mother to boys as she has a better rapport with males versus females. I can see her collecting insects for a science project, setting up aquariums or building hamster habitats. She can throw a football in a spiral, play baseball and feels more comfortable in sweats and sneakers than dressed up.
Emery will work hard to show her love to her family and likely will create her own holiday traditions that she will shove down your throat. Smile and enjoy it. She won't change. It's part of her upbringing and she loves to celebrate. Animal birthdays are not off limits either. Everything is worth celebrating to her. I envision her with a son and daughter. She loves challenges and I can see her relishing in raising two different genders. She will be the most nurturing, patient mother your children could ask for. She loves to teach and learn.
You must also love all types of music. You will muster up a smile as you listen to them belt out a song at the top of their lungs or hold their hand when a sad song brings a tear to their eye.
Please, dear future Son-in-Law's, lead your family well. Take them to church on Sundays and pray with them daily. Point them to God and always live a life and lifestyle glorifying to Him. If you are a man who will accompany her to church and seeks God, you will find her heart.
Mostly, I ask that you love my daughters well. Seriously. Love them with your whole heart. Listen intently when they share their heart. Treat them with respect. Be gentle. Never stop telling them or showing them how much you love her. They will need that constant reassurance. Don't let them down.
I have been praying for you son. You can do this!
I am a very generous person. If you treat them well and treat me well, you will be treated better. What's mine is yours; however, I am not giving you my daughter. She will forever be a part of my flesh and blood. I am simply lending her to you to love and protect as long as you both shall live.
Until we meet one day,
Your Future Mother-in-Law
